Today I want to talk about a subject what is so close to my heart as I battle it daily.
We all get nervous in life.
Anxiety can become a mental health problem if it impacts on your ability to live your life as fully as you want to. For example, it may be a problem for you if:
- your feelings of anxiety are very strong or last for a long time
- your fears or worries are out of proportion to the situation
- you avoid situations that might cause you to feel anxious
- your worries feel very distressing or are hard to control
- you regularly experience symptoms of anxiety, which could include panic attacks
- you find it hard to go about your everyday life or do things you enjoy. – Mind
I battle Social Phobia Disorder. It’s a form of anxiety. It stops me from living my life and doing the daily things as I’m scared of public interactions when I’m outside.
It’s not being arrogant.
It’s pretty shit you know, not being able to talk to anyone without looking red like a tomato and shaking like a leaf.
It’s not being rude.
It’s uncomfortable when I hear laughing by me as my mind tells me so many untrue things and I try my hardest not to believe it but it’s hard when your mind is telling you the same things 24/7. Sometimes it’s easier to believe your mind. As I always used to get told that your “head knows best” but does it really?
It’s not being lazy.
I’ve tried my hardest even on my bad days and if I can’t do the things I’ve planned. My head beats myself up about it all day and night.
I can’t help being that scared of social situations when I feel like my chest is getting tighter and I can’t breathe. I hate being ill. I wish I could just wake up and be like time to go on a long ass journey. I can’t get my head around it sometimes. I used to love exploring. Going on random adventures. Going on fun road trips.
Now it seems impossible to go to the corner shop without looking back my shoulder 20 times within 5 minutes. I can’t even make a simple phone call to my own family. I freak out and ask my Nan to do it.
The worst it got was that I was staying in my house for a year as I was that frighten I was going to get hurt if I even went out to the garden. I had no fresh air for a whole year. 365 days. Every time I tried to go out and when I touched the door handle. I started sweating and shaking and crying.
Sometimes I look back at my baby pictures and wonder if I was battling anxiety when I was a little child as well.
Here are some tips you could try:
- Talk to someone. This is the most important thing you can do. Talking saves lives. Talking does help. When I’m having a bad day, I tend to talk to my gran or I ring Samaritans on 116 123, as I’m comfortable with Samaritans now. If you are a child, you need to talk to someone. Ring Childline on 0800 1111 or their online service. Trust me they are so supportive and amazing people. Just as Samaritans are!
- It’s okay if you need another extra hour in bed, it’s completely fine if you need to do that and don’t let no one say different. Your mental health and physical health is more important. You are important. Anyone should understand that. If they don’t you need to remove yourself from that toxic situation!
- Use breathing techniques. -Will upload a post on breathing techniques soon!
- Listen to some music. – Will upload a post on my favourite songs what I listen too!
- Write your feelings and thoughts down. Start a journal and then show it to your doctor or a family member you can trust.
- Do your favourite hobby or think of a memory what made you smile. I always think of when I use to bake with my mum or when me and her use to jump on her bed to a song before she was poorly. Then sometimes I watch YouTube or do my make up when I’m feeling low.
You aren’t alone you know, you might feel alone but trust me you aren’t. You are loved and wanted.
You aren’t lazy. You are not a failure just because you couldn’t get out of bed today. You aren’t a freak.
You are a warrior and you are amazing for battling a shitty illness like anxiety or any illness.
Till next time.
Love, Shannon Diana x
If you would like to contact me for PR or any collaborations or even support if you are going through a bad time. Please follow my social media accounts and email me.