Hello, my lovely followers and readers of my blog! I hope you haven’t missed me that much!
I hope you are all okay and if you aren’t feeling ok. Just remember that’s it ok not to be ok and I hope you can get the right support you need and if you want to talk please remember that I’m here and the correct charities are here to support you!
If you haven’t seen my recent blog post please check that out.
Hello my loves, Hi, how are ya? No, how are you really?!
Today post is just a little update. I just wanted to write tonight. How’s your week been?! My week has been high and low at the same time.
The trouble with my bipolar is that it is mixed. I can be manic and depressive at the same time. I can have so much energy but I can be so tired as well. It’s confusing when someone asks me the “Are you ok? Shannon” question. Because I have no idea what to say. Do I say I’m happy or do I say I’m sad? I just answer that I don’t know because I don’t.
Some times it can be so scary when you are feeling so high but so suicidal at the same time. It’s so scary. I can’t explain the moment when you are doing something thanks to the manic energy but your brain just freezes and your demons come crashing down. Then it feels like a little prick on your arm and you have no idea how to speak. So, sometimes my speech is often disrupted or I talk overly fast. Or I can be telling someone something and it leads to 30 stories and I haven’t even finished the thing I wanted to talk about.
I cope somehow. I don’t know how I cope, I dunno how. I’m being 100% honest. I use to binge drink or take drugs to help ease my thoughts but I don’t do that anymore as I understand that it was making my bipolar 1000% worse. I kinda just shut myself off from the world when I’m feeling really low.
But you know what I do thank, having been diagnosed with Bipolar disorder mixed episode. It has made me stronger. It has made me think of all the positives even out of the shitty situation I am in.
One day at a time, recovery isn’t a straight road. It’s more like the spaghetti junction if I’m honest. One day you can be smiling.. Then the next day you can be crying your heart out.
If you do battle a mental illness you are a warrior, not a loser. Because nothing is harder than fighting with your own brain. Trust me, I know what it feels like to be discriminated against just because I am ill.
Till next time!
With lots of love!
Shannon Diana xx
Mental illness isn’t going to get the last laugh. I am.
I fight for my health and for other people’s health every single day in a way most people won’t understand, we aren’t lazy. We are warriors!
If you don’t feel like talking to yet, I’ll always be here and I’ll help out any way I can. You aren’t alone.
I know how it feels to be pushed aside. But listen, you are amazing and I’m proud of you so much.
Just so you know, it’s okay not to be okay you know, even the happiest person in the universe has their bad days. You can get through this dark hole. I believe in you.
You are loved. You are worth the fight. You are more than your illnesses, you can fight this I believe in you. You are flawless. You are fabulous. You aren’t alone. You are amazing and I’m proud of you all.
You can beat these thoughts. I believe in you. I will always be there for you even if it’s on the internet or email or even in person one day. You are loved. You are needed in this world because you are YOU. You are badass for battling mental illness daily. I care about every single one of you. You are more than enough. You don’t need to please anyone else.
Here is some numbers to contact if you are experiencing a mental health crisis:
Samaritans- For everyone! 24 hours, 7 days a week:
Call this number – 116 123
Email address is Jo@samaritans.org
Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) – For Men! 5pm to midnight every day.
Call this number: 0800 58 58 58
Webpage chat room if you don’t want to phone the link is: Webpage Chat
Papyrus- For people under 35! Monday to Friday 10am to 10pm. Weekends 2pm to 10pm. Bank Holidays 2pm to 5pm.
Phone number: 0800 068 41 41
Text Number: 07786 209697
Childline- For children and young people under 19.
Call 0800 1111 (Number won’t show up on your phone bill)
The Silver Line- For older people
Call: 0800 4 70 80 90
In Austraila- Call Lifeline Austraila at 13 11 14
Other places you could go or ring in a crisis in UK:
- Call your GP- Ask for an emergency appointment.
- Call 111 – Out of hours- They will help you find the support and help you need.
- Contact your mental health crisis team if you have one.
If you would like to contact me for PR or any collaborations or even support if you are going through a bad time. Please follow my social media accounts and email me.
Fitness/Gaming Instagram– @FitGurlShan
Facebook Page- Mental Health & My Life