Hello, my lovely followers and readers of my blog! I hope you haven’t missed me that much!
I hope you are all okay and if you aren’t feeling ok. Just remember that’s it ok not to be ok and I hope you can get the right support you need and if you want to talk please remember that I’m here and the correct charities are here to support you!
If you haven’t seen my recent blog post please check that out.
Hello my loves, Hi, how are ya? No, how are you really?!
As you know I’ve nearly been a blogger for 3 years! Only 2 years left until the 5th anniversary! I am currently listening to Example and the track I am listening too is called kickstart and I think it was kinda tied into this post and I’ve fallen back into love with my blog!
When I started writing on my blog. I was nineteen years old. I was lost. I had no hope. I was suicidal. I had nothing. I was fragile. I was scared. I had no confidence. I was hearing voices. I was paranoid. I was anxious. I was taking drugs and drinking alcohol. But one night when I was alone in my head at home in the bathroom, I wanted to write these thoughts down as I didn’t want to feel alone in mind anymore. DID I EVER THINK TO GOD THAT 2 MONTHS LATER. I would share it not to my family but the whole bloody world! Nah, I didn’t plan to share it with everyone at first but I thought it could help someone?!
3 years later. I’m 21 years old. I finally got my diagnosis of Bipolar Affective disorder. (It only took 10 years!) I have shit days still. They are crap. I’d love to be symptom-free just for one day but I can’t and if for any rare occasion, I do. I battled my ass off for a symptom-free day! I have good days. I mean they are bloody brilliant but rare. Also, I can’t laugh or smile without being asked, if I took my meds nowadays.
I don’t take drugs anymore. I stopped that shit a year ago as it messed with my brain more than my bipolar did. I understood that it was a bad coping mechanism, what I use to cling onto when I had a shit week.
I don’t drink either, I am sober. I have found my love for Ribena and summer fruits flavoured water now. I’m trying to quit smoking but it’s so hard. I kinda use that for my anxiety and when I’m having a shit day.
Hoping next psych appointment I have next, we can sort out a therapy plan. I’ve had my medication upped and changed.
One step at a time. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Recovery isn’t one of the things that you can wish for one night and wake up and you are cured. That is BS. I will fight those bad thunderstorms so I can see my rainbows.
It’s ok not to be ok and I’m slowly accepting that some days are worse than others.
Till next time!
With lots of love!
Shannon Diana xx
Mental illness isn’t going to get the last laugh. I am.
I fight for my health and for other people’s health every single day in a way most people won’t understand, we aren’t lazy. We are warriors!
If you don’t feel like talking to yet, I’ll always be here and I’ll help out any way I can. You aren’t alone.
I know how it feels to be pushed aside. But listen, you are amazing and I’m proud of you so much.
Just so you know, it’s okay not to be okay you know, even the happiest person in the universe has their bad days. You can get through this dark hole. I believe in you.
You are loved. You are worth the fight. You are more than your illnesses, you can fight this I believe in you. You are flawless. You are fabulous. You aren’t alone. You are amazing and I’m proud of you all.
You can beat these thoughts. I believe in you. I will always be there for you even if it’s on the internet or email or even in person one day. You are loved. You are needed in this world because you are YOU. You are badass for battling mental illness daily. I care about every single one of you. You are more than enough. You don’t need to please anyone else.
Here are some numbers to contact if you are experiencing a mental health crisis:
Samaritans- For everyone! 24 hours, 7 days a week:
Call this number – 116 123
Email address is Jo@samaritans.org
Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) – For Men! 5pm to midnight every day.
Call this number: 0800 58 58 58
Webpage chat room if you don’t want to phone the link is: Webpage Chat
Papyrus- For people under 35! Monday to Friday 10am to 10pm. Weekends 2pm to 10pm. Bank Holidays 2pm to 5pm.
Phone number: 0800 068 41 41
Text Number: 07786 209697
Childline- For children and young people under 19.
Call 0800 1111 (Number won’t show up on your phone bill)
The Silver Line- For older people
Call: 0800 4 70 80 90
In Austraila- Call Lifeline Austraila at 13 11 14
Other places you could go or ring in a crisis in UK:
- Call your GP- Ask for an emergency appointment.
- Call 111 – Out of hours- They will help you find the support and help you need.
- Contact your mental health crisis team if you have one.
If you would like to contact me for PR or any collaborations or even support if you are going through a bad time. Please follow my social media accounts and email me.
Fitness/Gaming Instagram– @FitGalShan
Facebook Page- Mental Health & My Life